How to become FAMOUS on Chess.com!

I'm literally all of the above 😭

i doubt it.

OK, I decided to do this because I have been seeing people all over voicing the idea of fame on this chess site. I assume this fame has a lot to do with forums, here is my idea on how YOU can become famous. I am going off of all who have been the popular forumers in the past.

(My) TOP TEN WAYS TO BECOME FAMOUS

1. Be the biggest troll of all timeBeing a troll is very helpful in becoming famous. Because, in the movie "The Greatest Showman" guess what Barnum said about publicity? "Doing something Right and doing something totally wrong is hardly a difference in the world of publicity. Guys, as long as your name is out there and at least 100 people know you are the biggest troll of all time you are well on your way to the fame
2. Have the worst Grammar on the siteThis includes NEVER capitalizing the word "I" Never using punctuation such as commas, periods and colons. But, most importantly, whenever possible USE ABBREVIATIONS. If you know the abbreviations and use them people will like you more and think you are a cool dude. Being cool is similar to being popular. So make sure to have the worst grammar.
3. Have at least 1 ALTIsn't that illegal? Well, in order to be famous there are illegal steps that must be taken. Go ahead and take these illegal steps...No famous guy on the site is ever gonna last forever so when the site closes you down, that marks the end. And it might be a relief.
4. Be a 700-900 Rated PlayerI am not saying to do a little sandbagging if you are better than this or cheat if you are worse. I am saying that if you are the type to become 'famous' on chess.com in the way we are talking about you will need to have a 700-900 rating. This rating does not make you famous, the fact that you are at that position and know you will be there the rest of your life. In other words, this step means you gotta NOT be on the Road to GM. Just step off and pretend you like chess when really you want social media and your parents haven't let you get facebook or Instegram yet. You must MAINTAIN your status of 700-900 rating. To become famous faster, do a little cheating and brag about a 90% accuracy. Be careful though, chess.com is against cheating (who knew?)
5. Be younger than 15This is another stereotypical person who will become famous. Being a young person makes you not have the common sense to see that their trolling is...nevermind, it's part of the fame. So if you are younger than 15 you have a good chance to go through fame on here without guilt.
6. Have a 1000+ comment forumOwning this can make you feel famous. If you know me I say Mindset is most important. So, give yourself the mindset that you are famous by achieving the goal of a 1000+ comment forum that is (obviously) a troll post. If it has any common sense in the first post then it kind of messes it up a little. But, if you obtain this thread before your journey to fame, you can use it.
7. Be ToxicToxic behavior is the nature of the public forums. The only way to be noticed on the forums is to be very toxic. Pick out the few other active forumers that you are going to hate above the rest. Make sure you are following the person you hate so that you can be toxic on their forums. When the block you that is a score, not a defeat, just keep that in mind, because if they block you that means that you are being noticed, and we want to make people notice us, that way we know we are getting somewhere
8. Comment in old forums with "Bump"Do this once weekly for a few weeks, then move to monthly. Just post a comment on forums from 2013 and 2015 saying "Bump" Sometimes comment on newer forums as well. Also, make sure to comment on at least 40% of all new forums that come out each day. If you do not do this your name will not be seen.
9. Own at least one 10 Member ClubThis is important because you don't have to do work to become a famous club owner and yet you can be a club owner and earn your fame as a club owner by completing the other important steps. Don't forget, your alts are 1/3 of the club as well
10. NEVER say anything positivePossibly the most important. You must ALWAYS have an air of authority about you. But if you are kind to people they will get the feeling you aren't above them. Make sure to stomp in the faces of the weak. Put mud on those that are challenging you. Don't allow anyone to misuse you for their own journey to fame. As far as you should be concerned, you are the only important person in the world. In fact, everyone else is here FOR your pleasure. Just remember that and you will have an easy time smashing people down.

Added in by commenters:

1. Profile PictureI have discovered that one of the most important ways is your profile picture. If you do not have one...good luck getting famous. If you have a anime girl then you have the best chances because you can get flies on your in no time IF you follow the other rules
2. Ignore all Evidence Ignore all evidence against you! Someone claiming you're not really an NM? Ignore it, maybe say that their profile picture is dumb. People showing your bad games because you're toxic? Ignore them, and continue to complain about the mistakes your opponents make, that you've made 10 times in your last 15 games.
3. Always dominate forumsBy dominating forum is meant that you are posting close to if not half of the comments on each page. This will be necessary for you in the case that a new active forum arises that seems popular. You MUST be around for the popular stuff.
4. Make phony exitsThis is when you make sure to tell everyone you are leaving (forum, tournament chat etc...) But don't actually leave. You need some positive feedback to pump you on your journey to famousness. Hearing those sad sighs and cries that you just left is going to give you the feeling you need to know you are on your way towards fame. Also, don't forget to show up to advertise yourself in many tournament chats, even if you no playing.
5. Use 'we' all the timeTalk in the name of yourself as a group, or talk int he name of someone else, making up false quotes about them to boost your famousness. Of course you have to do that with someone who already has considerable fame on the site so you can be seen to be connected with them.
6. Stick with the famous peopleIf you think that some person is famous, you need to defame them, but first you should use them to boost your fame. Start by following them and being first to post on their topics. Do other things like chat with them in public (i.e. notes) with them so people know you are close to them and they will start taking a liking to you
7. Defame the famousThis is a continuation of #6 here. After using a famous person to become famous you need to defame them, because the less people who are famous, the more famous the actually famous are. If you follow the logic...
8. More coming soon....updating...

I hope that you did NOT find any of you in any of these 10 listings. I am pretty sure that all of these are not-so good things and should not be used for fame, but sadly, these are the top 10 ways to fame on the site. If you think I missed anything, please let me know so I may add it. I would like it if you all avoid falling into these fame tricks, because if you think about it logically, even though you might be popular, you are more infamous than famous.

OK, I decided to do this because I have been seeing people all over voicing the idea of fame on this chess site. I assume this fame has a lot to do with forums, here is my idea on how YOU can become famous. I am going off of all who have been the popular forumers in the past.

(My) TOP TEN WAYS TO BECOME FAMOUS

1. Be the biggest troll of all timeBeing a troll is very helpful in becoming famous. Because, in the movie "The Greatest Showman" guess what Barnum said about publicity? "Doing something Right and doing something totally wrong is hardly a difference in the world of publicity. Guys, as long as your name is out there and at least 100 people know you are the biggest troll of all time you are well on your way to the fame
2. Have the worst Grammar on the siteThis includes NEVER capitalizing the word "I" Never using punctuation such as commas, periods and colons. But, most importantly, whenever possible USE ABBREVIATIONS. If you know the abbreviations and use them people will like you more and think you are a cool dude. Being cool is similar to being popular. So make sure to have the worst grammar.
3. Have at least 1 ALTIsn't that illegal? Well, in order to be famous there are illegal steps that must be taken. Go ahead and take these illegal steps...No famous guy on the site is ever gonna last forever so when the site closes you down, that marks the end. And it might be a relief.
4. Be a 700-900 Rated PlayerI am not saying to do a little sandbagging if you are better than this or cheat if you are worse. I am saying that if you are the type to become 'famous' on chess.com in the way we are talking about you will need to have a 700-900 rating. This rating does not make you famous, the fact that you are at that position and know you will be there the rest of your life. In other words, this step means you gotta NOT be on the Road to GM. Just step off and pretend you like chess when really you want social media and your parents haven't let you get facebook or Instegram yet. You must MAINTAIN your status of 700-900 rating. To become famous faster, do a little cheating and brag about a 90% accuracy. Be careful though, chess.com is against cheating (who knew?)
5. Be younger than 15This is another stereotypical person who will become famous. Being a young person makes you not have the common sense to see that their trolling is...nevermind, it's part of the fame. So if you are younger than 15 you have a good chance to go through fame on here without guilt.
6. Have a 1000+ comment forumOwning this can make you feel famous. If you know me I say Mindset is most important. So, give yourself the mindset that you are famous by achieving the goal of a 1000+ comment forum that is (obviously) a troll post. If it has any common sense in the first post then it kind of messes it up a little. But, if you obtain this thread before your journey to fame, you can use it.
7. Be ToxicToxic behavior is the nature of the public forums. The only way to be noticed on the forums is to be very toxic. Pick out the few other active forumers that you are going to hate above the rest. Make sure you are following the person you hate so that you can be toxic on their forums. When the block you that is a score, not a defeat, just keep that in mind, because if they block you that means that you are being noticed, and we want to make people notice us, that way we know we are getting somewhere
8. Comment in old forums with "Bump"Do this once weekly for a few weeks, then move to monthly. Just post a comment on forums from 2013 and 2015 saying "Bump" Sometimes comment on newer forums as well. Also, make sure to comment on at least 40% of all new forums that come out each day. If you do not do this your name will not be seen.
9. Own at least one 10 Member ClubThis is important because you don't have to do work to become a famous club owner and yet you can be a club owner and earn your fame as a club owner by completing the other important steps. Don't forget, your alts are 1/3 of the club as well
10. NEVER say anything positivePossibly the most important. You must ALWAYS have an air of authority about you. But if you are kind to people they will get the feeling you aren't above them. Make sure to stomp in the faces of the weak. Put mud on those that are challenging you. Don't allow anyone to misuse you for their own journey to fame. As far as you should be concerned, you are the only important person in the world. In fact, everyone else is here FOR your pleasure. Just remember that and you will have an easy time smashing people down.

Added in by commenters:

1. Profile PictureI have discovered that one of the most important ways is your profile picture. If you do not have one...good luck getting famous. If you have a anime girl then you have the best chances because you can get flies on your in no time IF you follow the other rules
2. Ignore all Evidence Ignore all evidence against you! Someone claiming you're not really an NM? Ignore it, maybe say that their profile picture is dumb. People showing your bad games because you're toxic? Ignore them, and continue to complain about the mistakes your opponents make, that you've made 10 times in your last 15 games.
3. Always dominate forumsBy dominating forum is meant that you are posting close to if not half of the comments on each page. This will be necessary for you in the case that a new active forum arises that seems popular. You MUST be around for the popular stuff.
4. Make phony exitsThis is when you make sure to tell everyone you are leaving (forum, tournament chat etc...) But don't actually leave. You need some positive feedback to pump you on your journey to famousness. Hearing those sad sighs and cries that you just left is going to give you the feeling you need to know you are on your way towards fame. Also, don't forget to show up to advertise yourself in many tournament chats, even if you no playing.
5. Use 'we' all the timeTalk in the name of yourself as a group, or talk int he name of someone else, making up false quotes about them to boost your famousness. Of course you have to do that with someone who already has considerable fame on the site so you can be seen to be connected with them.
6. Stick with the famous peopleIf you think that some person is famous, you need to defame them, but first you should use them to boost your fame. Start by following them and being first to post on their topics. Do other things like chat with them in public (i.e. notes) with them so people know you are close to them and they will start taking a liking to you
7. Defame the famousThis is a continuation of #6 here. After using a famous person to become famous you need to defame them, because the less people who are famous, the more famous the actually famous are. If you follow the logic...
8. More coming soon....updating...

I hope that you did NOT find any of you in any of these 10 listings. I am pretty sure that all of these are not-so good things and should not be used for fame, but sadly, these are the top 10 ways to fame on the site. If you think I missed anything, please let me know so I may add it. I would like it if you all avoid falling into these fame tricks, because if you think about it logically, even though you might be popular, you are more infamous than famous.

I don't understand these things but what's the point of being famous? Why? For what reason? I'm not famous. Nobody knows me and i don't know anybody here. Why you have to change yourself to become famous? Just be yourself. That's enough

Imagine becoming famous because you posted a forum about how to become famous 🤔