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Invent the new worst/most useless chess piece ever!

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gookula

The book. It looks like a rook but the top is full of dreadful newspapers. It can shoot out these newspapers diagonally and the piece that it attacks misses a turn compelled to read the rubbish newspaper or book. Can move one square at a time but must then captured like a king. Can be taken off board and restored

Idrinkyourhealth3
gookula wrote:

The book. It looks like a rook but the top is full of dreadful newspapers. It can shoot out these newspapers diagonally and the piece that it attacks misses a turn compelled to read the rubbish newspaper or book. Can move one square at a time but must then captured like a king. Can be taken off board and restored

lmao n1

PATRlCKSTAR2

the bird: moves like a knight and camel but in order to use it you must play birds opening as white and f5 as black

Idrinkyourhealth3

the-AAA(Anti aircraft artillery). A sophisticated miniature of the original AAA that occupies a random empty square on the board and annihilates the mosquitos and other insects that dare to get in a radius of 1 m. Requires 1 AA battery to function. Can be captured.

PATRlCKSTAR2

auto-target nuke: when the enemy king is isolated (all squares it can go to are empty) the nuke targets the king and fires. if the king explodes, that side loses. if the timer explodes, it is a draw. if both kings explode, it is also a draw

Idrinkyourhealth3

The Catapult. Can be loaded with any captured piece and can shoot and hit the villain's pieces so if you hit you gain time while the opponent puts it back to the correct square. The most skilled catapult players can create a real chaos by shooting VARIOUS PIECES out of the board and if the villain puts the pieces back to incorrect squares they can report it to the referee and claim a victory

PATRlCKSTAR2

the wand: you can buy it at a store and put it on your king and something magical will happen... except all the spells hurt you (like not being able to move your pawns)

Aluicious

The butt. It sits on top of the knight and prevents it from jumping over any pieces.

Arisktotle

The Tenth Queen. When your queen reserves have been depleted by promoted pawns and you need one more, there is still the Tenth Queen. It is locked away in a hidden compartment of your chess box. You can use it just once before it self-destructs as if you play in an M.I. sequel rather than a chess game.

gookula

The killer: you play until you capture the king and then you switch over to the other side. It can't be captured itself.

Aluicious

The Big Poop - works just like the Poop, but it takes up 2 squares instead of one

Arisktotle

The Slippery Slope piece. Any unit attempting to capture it slides back to the edge of the board!

Aluicious

The HUGE poop - it works just like a Big Poop, but it takes up 3 squares instead of 2

Idrinkyourhealth3

The speed radar, stays on the center cross. If a bishop, rook or queen excels the 6 sq/turn limit the radar flashes and the piece gets ''arrested'' ; stays 1 turn out of the board.

LordHunkyhair3

The square: this piece is like all other chess pieces, except that can't be moved... Or captured... But can always be landed on... Come to think of it-- you start with 64 of them in any game of chess.

BOWTOTHETOAST

the chick- The chick can not be moved or captured, but every 4 moves, it lays an egg on a random square. If left untouched for 4 moves, the egg will hatch into another chick, but if a piece lands on it, the egg will break and trap the piece for 2 moves, before the liquid disappears. But with every move of those 2 moves, the chick will jump 2 squares towards the trapped piece, and if it gets landed on by the chick, it will be captured( Includes Kings).

Idrinkyourhealth3

The crusher: Moves automatically 1 square per turn in a loop e4-e5-d5-d4-e4(...) and erases whatever is on its way. After move 28 the radius expands 1 square and then It expands after every loop turn until no playable squares left, whoever's king get crushed first loses

Idrinkyourhealth3

The brick. A one solid standard brick thrown vertically from the roof by a wild monkey. Can happen randonmly anytime from move 40 to 60 and IS considered part of the game if It hits the board.

EXAMPLE: White has a Queen and a rook and is about to checkmate the black's king on the move 42. Unfortunately a brick violenly hits the board smashing all white's pieces including the king. Black wins.

If the brick isn't thrown by a wild monkey then is considered ilegal

Idrinkyourhealth3

The newborn pawn. If a player positions his queen next to his King for more than 3 turns in a row the queen gets pregnant and gives birth to a pawn on an adjqcent square. It can be captured but It can't capture nor move. But if you capture it then the queen gets "enraged" for 1 turn and gets the ability to move 16 squares and eat more than 1 piece

Idrinkyourhealth3

The foreign king. If a player hasn't moved one of his pawns by move 50 a third grey King appears on the board. If you checkmate It you are allowed to take this piece home after the game but serves no other purpose .It moves itself. Some people say this piece is moved by mother nature, others say its rc and has an AA battery but nobody actually knows where does It come from and how does It work. Nobody has ever took It home and It remains a mystery