You sound good to me; just a bit frustrated with the process. The average chess rating is something you are already WAY higher than:
It sounds to me more like you are suffering from chess burnout, or some forms of chess tilt. I realize that the next video I'm about to recommend is almost an hour long, but it is super helpful information; think of it as an investment of your time. This video less than an hour could save you many hours if you even get a few more chess wins because of it, since you won't have to spend time recovering rating you lose from other games:
I spend a lot of time reading chess books and studying to become a better player. I'm just getting worse. I hit 1300 in rapid, and I started thinking I was actually good at this game. Wrong! After the few days that got me to 1300, I've gone back to my normal performances. Bad. Keep dropping to 1100's and losing quite pathetically. I study and study and try really hard to take my chess to the next level, but it's hopeless. I have 1 good day of chess a week and the rest of days are me playing like a complete amateur. It makes me wonder, how the heck did I even reach above 1000 when I play worse than 800 rated players a lot of the time. I'm hanging pieces and falling for simple tactics. No matter how hard I try, it feels as if it's not meant to be. Maybe my brain can't handle chess? I do have adhd and dyslexia so focus and alertness really is a problem for me. Sometimes I feel like giving up, but I always come back because I love the game. It's frustrating though. I'm getting angry when I play recently, and I'm not enjoying it as much. I think I lost the plot.