Why do people accept long games and then complain that I spend a lot of time?

I understand why people could prefer to play blitz games rather than long games. What I don't understand is why people accept my long time control challenges (such as 60 or 90 minutes per player) and then they blitz out all their moves and then they complain that I spend a lot of time and they demand that I play fast and then (when I refuse to speed up the pace) they disconnect. This doesn't happen only occasionally. This happens like half of the time. This happens on all chess playing websites, not just on chess.com.

I thought that maybe they accidentally click on my challenges. But then why don't they just abort the game immediately? Do they only realize that it's a long time control game after they've already made a few moves?

When my opponent spends a lot of time pondering about his moves, this does not bother me at all, I just watch some Youtube videos or do some reading while he ponders about his moves. The only problem is that sometimes I don't hear the sound.

I have also experienced this and that chat makes me lose focus on the game. When I start a game with 60 minutes it is because I want to have more time to spend on my moves.

monkeys flyyyyyyyyyy

^ This.

There's virtually no reason at all to have chat allowed during a rated game ... Your opponent should not be able to say anything to you at all, except to request a draw ...

But yes, regarding the original question - I'd say that many players are impatient and think too shallowly / play too quickly. They aren't used to the pace of slower chess.

Why are there two settings for chat. Chat request and game chat ? When could it make sense to only have one of these disabled ?

Different people like their chess different ways.
Some people like you prefer to keep the entire focus on the game and treat every move of every game as if you were in a serious tournament.
Other people play chess as a way to socialize and meet people from all around the world.
Most people fall somewhere in between - generally want to be able to focus on the game, but willing to engage in a little casual chat like saying stuff like "good move"/"nice find" or "where are you from? what's the chess scene like there?"

very good discussions here about time and chat limits etc--long games bore me -- but others enjoy them good for them-- i think when iam playing a long game 30 min and up the other guy is using a bot to play his moves -- its just a feeling but how do tell in a 5 min 3 min game you know its all about him/her against you its to fast for bot replay to help someone i could be wrong -- but its just a feeling i have --

Maybe play the 24 hour daily game instead of a 90 minute game.

You must be the kind of person that will unnecessarily think of how to "protect" your king in a dead losing position, or take a whole 30 seconds to develop your pawn to the center on the second move of the game

@1

They lack the nerves to play blitz and the patience to play long games.

they like bullet i guesss